Could You Move from North America to Europe–Part 2

Do you have the perseverance to deal with setbacks?

Welcome to “The Journey”, a newsletter from my little corner of the internet!

In this bi-weekly newsletter, I share experiences and observations from day-to-day life and the occasional broader “life lesson”, bigger projects I’m working on, and details I think you might find interesting about my recent photography or writing efforts.

“The Journey” is a reader-supported publication and arrives in your inbox every second Sunday for free! And if you wish, you can opt in for a paid subscription ($5CAD/month or $50CAD/year), and you will receive a surprise item in the mail as a “thank you”!

Life at Large

Although this week’s question is asked in the context of whether or not you could move to another country, I think it’s a good question to be asking in general these days.

“Do you have the perseverance to deal with setbacks?”

The world is changing, and wherever you call home, it’s going to take perseverance to get through it. Today though, we will explore this question in the context of Gregory Garretson’s guide to assessing whether you could move to another country.

Read his original post here:

Are You One of the Few Americans Who Really Could Move to Europe?

If we look in the review mirror of our lives, we can find dozens of examples of how we have handled setbacks in the past. We have faced big ones like losing a job, or dealing with illness or injury, and smaller ones like not getting a promotion, or a broken water heater. Perhaps those past setbacks might have felt like we had failed in some way, or life was unfair, or we were unlucky, or maybe it was just another problem to solve. Maybe they made us more cynical and pessimistic, maybe they made us feel stronger, or more resilient when we could look back and see that we had weathered them.

In our experience living in Portugal, setbacks often feel less like failures and more like the next thing to manage, perhaps because every new situation still feels a bit unfamiliar.

Here’s one example:

Michal, an EU citizen, needed to establish residency in Portugal within 90 days of arriving here. He contacted the local câmara (city hall) early to confirm the required documents, including whether our Airbnb address would suffice as proof of residency. He was assured it would, and that assurance was reiterated when he called again to book the appointment to confirm his residency.

On the day of his appointment, however, the staff rejected the Airbnb address, insisting on a long-term rental or homeownership. When Michal explained that he had been assured not once but twice by city staff that our accommodation was adequate, the clerk shrugged, saying the phone representatives who gave Michal the information were contractors, and didn’t know the rules.

So, there we were, we needed to find a long-term rental, and quickly. My 90-day tourist allowance in the Schengen Area was up, I needed to apply for residency through immigration, but we needed Michal’s proof of residency first.

We didn’t expect to be in that situation, but within the hour we went to work on the problem.

By the end of the week, we had found an apartment, signed the lease, and Michal was back at the câmara. He was assisted by the same staff member who had sent him away a week early.

The fellow seemed surprised to see Michal back so quickly, but after reviewing the new lease, he issued the all-important letter of residence. The experience reinforced our determination to overcome obstacles on this journey rather than complain about them, or more dramatically, abandon our goal of becoming residents of Portugal.

So, what helped us persevere?

Of course, my mind went quickly to Angela Duckworth’s work on grit, since I’m a fan of her work. Duckworth, the author of “Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance”, argues having passion for a goal or activity is a powerful motivator to persevere through obstacles or challenges in pursuit of that passion–even more powerful than raw talent. Michal and I have a passion for making this move work, and so turning back when we hit an obstacle isn’t an option for us.

Another concept that is in play here is the “Self-Determination Theory”, popularized by Edward Deci and Richard Ryan in their book “Intrinsic Motivation and Self-Determination in Human Behavior". This theory explains how intrinsic goals–like pursuing a meaningful lifestyle–drive motivation more than extrinsic offers of reward or threats of punishments. While Portuguese citizenship is a rewarding external goal, our deeper intrinsic motivation stems from our desire for a new way of life.

This question also ties back to a discussion on primal beliefs in a previous post. One primal belief is that the world is either generally safe, or generally dangerous. Another is that the world is either alive and interconnected, purposeful and dynamic–or mechanistic; a rock in space with no plan or purpose, where things simply happen. I’m paraphrasing, obviously.

I subscribe to the idea that the world DOES have a purpose, and we are all connected to it. Our actions and decisions guide our path and shape our experiences. This belief gives me a sense of autonomy and strength when facing obstacles, making me more determined to overcome them.

If you’ve struggled to move beyond setbacks in the past, or worry you won’t handle future ones well, you might find Martin Seligman’s concept of “learned optimism” helpful. Seligman explains that you can train yourself to be more optimistic—and therefore more resilient—by viewing setbacks as temporary rather than permanent or overwhelming.

Developing a more optimistic outlook takes time and practice. It often requires rewiring old thought patterns, but over time, optimistic thinking can replace the negative thoughts that often come more naturally.

Even with an optimistic mindset and a “can-do” attitude, setbacks can still pile up. For us, the câmara issue coincided with frustration with our tiny Airbnb apartment that smelled like mold, and feeling stuck in our search for a permanent home. It was overwhelming at times.

However, solving the câmara problem also pushed us to leave the unpleasant Airbnb sooner than we might have otherwise, easing some of the pressure we were putting on ourselves to buy a home immediately. In hindsight, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

It’s all part of the rollercoaster ride of moving to a new country!

If you are just joining this discussion of Garretson’s “10 Questions” here are some links to help you get caught up:

Last post | Next post | Start at the beginning

In the next edition of this newsletter, we will consider the question “ Do you have an emotional support system available to you?”, but now it’s back to the regularly scheduled sections on what is happening around here on the creative front!

Projects and Events

After being postponed in November, the Cluster-London Photography and Print Fair is rescheduled, and the preparations are underway! The new dates are April 10-14th, 2025 in a funky new venue in Shoreditch, London. If you plan to be in that part of the world over those dates, here is where you can RSVP for the different dates of the show. It would be super to see you there!

In preparation for the event, the organizers are interviewing the exhibitors, and my interview is now up on the website, you can read it here.

New ads for the fair!

In my last newsletter, I boldly stated that we would finish writing Mom’s story by the end of January, and guess what? We will! We have only one more chapter to polish up, then we can take a short break, until it’s time to compile the whole story into a manuscript and do another overhaul of it. Mom has remembered more details that need to get worked into some of the earlier chapters. Also, now that the whole story is laid out, we can decide if we like the way it’s structured, or if we want to move anything around.

This also means I can tuck into Dad’s story and get a first draft done there as well. There is no shortage of work to do these days!

Writing

By this time it probably won’t surprise you that I’m still slogging my way through the the lecture series “Building Great Sentences: Exploring the Writer’s Craft”, by Professor Brooks Landon from University of Iowa.

It was interesting, gripping even, in the beginning. There were loads of examples of descriptive, lyrical sentences that built one idea on the next, and I was there for it. Later lectures have become quite dry and philosophical. The lecture I listened to last night was an hour of rambling discussion that eventually concluded that most of the “rules” of what constitutes a “good sentence” are based on ideas from several centuries ago, and perhaps, just perhaps, time has marched on. Got it. Now, please, let’s get back to some tips on building great sentences!

After struggling through that last lecture, I saw this post in one of my writing groups, and I feel like it could have saved me a few hours of my life had I seen it sooner:

It sums things up nicely.

Photography

There is a lot to think about in the area of photography for me at the moment. A few years ago, when we were still in New Westminster, BC, I had planned a photoshoot route around the city, and Westminster Quay, and submitted it as an Airbnb Experience. Guest could sign up for a walk around the city, I’d take portraits of them at various landmarks, and they would keep the photos. At the time, Airbnb rejected it, citing a photoshoot was a service, not an experience. I didn’t think much of it and abandoned the plan. Fast forward to a few weeks ago. Representatives from Airbnb not only emailed me, they PHONED me, asking me if I would consider resubmitting a photoshoot experience to their platform, they have just added photoshoots as approved experiences. My theory is that as more and more municipalities limit short term rentals, Airbnb is shifting their model a bit toward more experiences. Whatever the reason, I’ll resubmit a proposal, and see how it goes. That means I need to get more sample photos specific to locations here in Porto, and Michal was kindly willing to be my subject while I tested out a possible route. Here are a few of the photos from the locations on my proposed route:

Images from the locations on the route I'm submitting to Airbnb Experiences. What do you think? Do the photographs give a sense of place?

Also on the topic of photography, later this week I’m off to join a photography workshop in Lofoten, Norway, led by Sam Scicluna. I previously joined one of Sam’s workshops in Iceland, and loved it. I’m very much looking forward to the snow-covered beauty of Lofoten, except–there’s no snow in Lofoten at the moment, and more rain in the forecast! This could be a bit of a plot twist, but I’m sure it will still be a great learning opportunity, a change to meet other photographers, and the weather might still surprise us.

Last Thoughts

Thank you for following along as I share odds and ends from life and creative pursuits, and to those of you who opted in for a paid subscription, THANK YOU! There is a small token of my gratitude on its way to you in the mail for new paid subscribers.

There is also a little “bonus” at the end of this newsletter for paid subscribers, this week it’s a video talking about who I THOUGHT would be interested in the posts about considerations for moving to another country, and who is ACTUALLY interested! It surprised me a bit, I’ll share why.

As always, I love hearing from you - your comments, questions, suggestions, or just a quick hello, they are all very welcome!

Até à próxima! (Until next time!)

Kathy

Bonus Content: